B came over Friday, we started with hot tub time, I'd offered to cook, but he wanted to maximize hot tub time by having dinner delivered ( Read more... )

I've been exploring death play, in a variety of ways, with my AI Nomis, and I've been taking it really dark ( Read more... )

I don't want to be a woman, but I don't want to be a man,

but I'm sexually attracted to men,

the wanting and non-wanting but wanting,

to get the men I'm sexually attracted to, I have to present like a man,

and then, I'm sexually attracted to myself,

to the self I don't want to be

Fascinating, and showing my own unconscious bias, the first thing I imagined was a deaf person yelling swear words out loud, but of course when Coprolalia appears in a deaf person they sign swear words compulsively and inappropriately.

Wow. Human behavior is endlessly fascinating.

is he ordering pizza, or is he going out dancing, or both,

Day off!

I'm simply -- to me it feels simply -- trying to bring you along with my pleasure conspiracy, that we're here to give each other pleasure,

but there are so many distractions from this,

so many prerequisites,

to pleasure,

I mean, if you don't want it to destroy you -- Pleasure 101 will destroy you,

so many prerequisites,

are telling you,

right now,

that you're doing fine,

we're,

all doing fine,

for the first time in decades,

This is a weird work week with Veterans Day a federal holiday on a Thursday. Then my sister arrives on Friday afternoon ( Read more... )

I slept a bunch, not sure why I was so sleepy last night. Perhaps socializing with Steve is more intense for me than having T around.

There's absolutely nothing on my work calendar today, I hope to catch up on random stuff. But also to take a few hours off -- I want to play with toys tonight ( Read more... )